Adaptability to a Fault
Human beings are pretty amazing: we have speech, we can continue to learn all our lives, we can connect deeply, we evolve and problem-solve, and we adapt. Our adaptability is one of our superpowers! We change and adapt to an ever-changing environment and circumstances.
But our capacity to adapt sometimes comes and bites us. There are times when we are too adaptable! This incredible superpower of ours is no longer serving us, it is harming us. We become the frog in the boiling pot, continuously adapting to the increasing temperature. Until we die. A better outcome would have been to get out of the pot as it was getting increasingly hot.
I see this overuse of the superpower with both clients and friends. The inertia takes over and we rather stay in an uncomfortable (or right out dangerous), but known, environment than to embark on the path of change. How many people do you know who are complaining and are unhappy about their jobs? I bet quite a few! Somehow it seems easier, better to stay than to find new pasture.
It took a client of mine, several reminders and own insights before he also concluded that he deserved a better, healthier environment. He is now in a happier, healthier organization working for a leadership boss, excited to have left his micromanaging boss behind.
I see the same adaptability overdrive with friends too. A friend got injured playing pickle ball. She got hurt quite badly and was in pain for a long time. I gently asked curiosity questions about the pain and how come she accepted it.
Pain, physical and emotional, is a funny thing. We need to feel pain – it’s a good thing! Pain helps us identify that something is wrong, and we need to do something about it. Much like putting our hand on a hot stove, you feel the pain and remove your hand. You wouldn’t choose to keep your hand on the stove. Pain is good, it’s an alert telling the brain and the body “it’s time to make another decision”.
As a redhead I have a special relationship with pain. About 2% of the world’s population are redheads having the gene MC1R. That same gene gives us a general higher tolerance for pain as it releases a hormone similar to endorphins which limit the feeling of pain. So while I have a physical high pain tolerance, I have a very low psychological pain tolerance. In my book we shouldn’t have to put up with physical pain or discomfort unnecessarily. Whenever I have an injury or pain of some sort, I address it. Right away. I don’t want to get used to pain. I want to find the underlying cause and make it go away. That could include physical therapy, massage, a trip to the chiropractor or acupuncturist. I do my PT exercises, hot/cold patches or whatever it takes. Yes, sometimes it takes a week or more : )
My point is that we don’t have to choose to tolerate pain unnecessary. What pain points do you want to get rid of? What’s a step you can take to make it so?
